I’m a little bored lately, soo…
There are certain things about H!P that I cannot STAND. Sometimes I find myself daydreaming about what I would do differently if I were in charge of H!P Units, Music, Popularity of the Girls…everything. A lot of times when we get announcements I’m not excited at all, because it’ll most likely be another piece of **** group who’ll release only one single and then disappear.
I think these one-hitters are BAD. I think a lot of things going on in H!P are bad, a lot of things in the past, and the present, and honestly I’m not expecting much for the future either.
So, here is how I would manage the Hello! Project:
Starting with Morning Musume:
1) Risa and Takahashi would be OUT. But save them for later.
2) With the 5 gens gone, Kamei would be the leader~!
3) Leads would from then on be given to Tanaka, Kamei, and the rest of the girls would get 80% more lines then they do now.
4) LinLin would be forced to use her “real” voice, and Michishige and Mitsui would be given intensive vocal training.
5) Kusumi’s two front teeth would be corrected once and for all, FINALLY.
6) With the number of members down to 7, at least 3 new members would be added, ranging from ages 14-17. Teenagers are the most interesting and the easiest to mold. I don’t know about the rest of you, but I love watching them transform.
7) The next few singles would be of a cuter style, like Joshi Kashimashi, or Sexy Boy, both of which were upbeat and cute, but still very appealing when it came to the way the girls looked.
Kusumi would get 70% less screen time and lines in this group, and would become less popular, at least as a Morning Musume member.
Berryz Koubou:
1) Momoko would quit using her baby voice and start using a voice that would make actual sense in relation to her age. If she really isn’t capable of any other kind of voice, she would join Michishige and Mitsui in vocal training.
2) Chinami would be pushed to the front, Yurina even more-so to the back.
3) Sugaya Risako would continue to take the spotlight and all of the popularity of the group.
4) Miyabi would graduate. (YES, A BK GRADUATION.)
5) Saki would graduate.
6) Berryz would be down to 5 members, the more popular girls being Risako, Chinami, and Momoko.
7) They would release more “mature” sounding songs like basically what they’ve recently been releasing, excluding Tsukiatteru.
C-ute:
1) Megumi would come back, a little grown up, and improved.
2) C-ute would pretty much stay how it is, but Airi, Maimi, AND Megumi would have all the lines, while the others continued to occupy the background of the group. (:
Buono!:
1) Would continue to release wonderful material.
Ongaku Gatas:
1) Same
Milky Way:
1) Would attempt to become as popular as Buono! or even Kusumi Koharu herself.
New Groups:
1) Ishikawa Rika, Suzuki Airi, Sugaya Risako, and Mitsui in a girly unit.
2) Kamei, Tanaka, Maasa in a more “cool” sounding unit. (Think Warera Kamen or Dschinghis Khan type music and vocals.)
3) Miyoshi Erika, Umeda Erika, and some random, pretty Eggs, in a more kiddish group.
4) Ai Takahashi, Niigaki Risa, and Miyabi, in a Sexy Otana Jan type group.
-Melon Kinenbi would graduate.
-KiraPika would be eliminated.
-Athena & Robokerottsu would be eliminated.
-Nono would come back and at least MC once in a while.
-GAM would continue and actually release GOOD material, and put effort into their dancing and performances.
-Abe would start releasing more things, maybe The Stress type songs, and would get an updated image so she wouldn’t look like an old mother anymore.
- Ayaka’s Totsugeki English Lessons would come back!
- Mano Erina would be a BIG THING, comparable in time to Ayaya (:.
- Ayaya would be busy with GAM.
-Shuffles would come back.
-Ishikawa would continue to get PB after PB.
-Sayumi, Reina, Eri, Ai, Risa, and Risako too, would continue to get PB after PB.
-JunLin would get a double/shared PB
- Erina would get a new image, then a PB, then continue to get them regularly.
cfb said
Interesting thoughts, but – no offense – I’m glad you’re not running Hello!Project. XD
Most of the decisions you’re making here seem to be based on your own personal preferences, rather than what would be best for the fans or for the company as a whole. If that’s what you were going for…awesome, great post. That’s a really interesting approach to showing your current feelings about H!P. However, if your point here is to improve Hello!Project overall…I’ll just say that you’d have a lot of very upset fans were you to implement these changes. Not to say that you suck or anything (I enjoy your posts, even when I disagree with them), but please, please don’t go steal H!P away from Tsunku/UFA. XD
It’s all said with love,
– Zac
maiZe said
“4) Ai Takahashi, Niigaki Risa, and Miyabi, in a Sexy Otana Jan type group.”
*pre-orders their first single – and any subsequent releases!!* … Oh wait… this is all theoretical… T_T
saplesweet said
Zac- your response is exactly what I was looking for. I write what I feel and think so that others, like you, can write a response to me, whether you disagree or not, I love to hear it! So I really appreciate your comment.
In all honesty, I would be extremely happy if things in H!P just suddenly started going my way and everything I wrote in this post started coming true one by one.
I know a lot of people would be infuriated, but that’s the fun of a post like this!
Getting to see what others would do with H!P seems like fun, and I wish others would post about it!
The fake changes I wrote about here are based on my personal preferences, but I do think SOME of the things I thought up would be better for the company :/. It’s just me though, and I respect whoever wants to disagree.
Anyway, thank you for giving me your opinion, I love to hear from anyone who reads my blog (:. It’s my first blog, and I’m no good at writing or anything, so I’m happy when I get responses.
I am glad you like my posts, have you read a lot of them?
(:
Radicalpatriot said
Hmm. Morning Musume does need some major reworking, but where would you get the three new members? I actually like Momoko’s squeaky voice in some songs, and please keep Megumi far away from C-ute. She and Tsunku must have had a real blowout, and her singing days are long gone.
http://www.radicalpatriot.vox.com
cfb said
I’ve read most of your recent posts about H!P, and I do like them. The ones that stand out are your ‘list’ posts, like this one and the mean girl/nice girl ones. I also like how you state your opinion without censoring it. With a community like this one, where hardcore fandom and defensiveness for personal favorites abound, it takes some guts to be blunt, and I can appreciate someone who does that. Also, don’t put yourself down so much, your writing is just fine. You get your point across clearly and your material is fun to read, so that’s all that matters. : D
– Zac
saplesweet said
Radicalpatriot- I would get the 3 new members from auditions, because I think the Eggs have a lot more work to go through in my opinion. 3 new, fresh faces would be great for MM! We only got a Mitsui in the last audition, and JunJun and LinLin seem like recycled accidents. I wouldn’t try to totally replicate the “Golden Age” of The Peace! and such, but if I were in charge of Morning Musume ( (: ) I would try to add as many members as I think the current girls could handle. Like a 4th or 6th gen. sized addition. And I would be sure to choose girls who sincerely loved Morning Musume (:.
I like Momoko’s voice as well, I actually prefer it to a lot of the Kids’ voices. But I think she could do SO much more with it that she is not showing us. So I would at least try to get something more out of her! And Megumi was so cute! She was full of potential, although I will admit she did seem kind of boring personality-wise. Sometimes I wish she would come back, but other times I feel like there wouldn’t be enough spotlight for Airi, Maimi, and Megumi all at once.
cfb- thank you! If you don’t mind, I added you to my blogroll. I’ve been reading at Obnoxious Wota and you had an extremely interesting idea to start your blog with. I find myself laughing when I read some of those conversations because I’ve had ones very similar about certain members and such (:
maiZe said
Note: I typed this up last nght, but WP has not been loading some blogs for me for some reason, so hopefully this comment can finally get posted.>_<
Now that I’ve got more time to post a more thought out comment (was at work when I first read this), I have to agree with Zac…
Knocking out Risa and Ai from MM would kill MM for me. Taking Miya out of Berryz would kill Berryz for me, and Chisato continuing to get zero lines in C-ute would make me much more aggravated than I already am in regards to C-ute (the last point is most likely to continue on for at least a little while, unless by some miracle Chisato’s talent is suddenly held in higher regard by UFA than NakaSaki’s looks).
However, I love the idea of a group with Risa, Ai and Miya (if you couldn’t tell from my other comment). Making a subgroup with them (and possibly adding Chisato to that group) that’s more than a one-time shot would be a dream come true for me. Back in the day, there were subgroups that weren’t tied to animes that lasted for more than 1 single (ie. Tanpopo, Pucchi Moni, Minimoni).
I totally agree with you on bringing back the English Lessons, but for a little spin on it, I’d have it co-hosted with Mako-chan whenever she comes back from studying English in New Zealand. I like to tell myself that she’s studying English solely for this purpose! XD (kidding…)
Other thoughts:
- Buono! FTW! They must stay forever!
- A&R disbanding would be sad (but that’s b/c I love that Risa and Chisato get some quailty coverage in that group).
- Would love for the shuffles to come back!!
So, some hits and some misses in this list of yours (in regards to my tastes), but until I read this, I had never thought of a Miya/Risa/Ai subgroup (+Chisato in my perfect world). A fun post overall.
saplesweet said
(: Yes, i know a lot of people would be highly upset if Ai or Risa, or ESPECIALLY both were to graduate! I would actually miss them too, most of all because Takahashi has THE best voice in the line-up right now…
As for Miyabi…eh, I can live without her. I just think that lately she’s been in the background of Berryz, and seems more mature than the other girls…I don’t know it just really seems to me that she doesn’t fit in so well. Plus she has Buono!, who I LOVE! So I chose to graduate her so she could be in Buono! and the SexyOtonajan group (:. I think it’d be a good idea. Most of the focus of Berryz is on Sugaya anyway ):
Also, I know a lot of people want more Chisato, and I just don’t get it! She has a great voice and all, but she looks like an absolute child, and her dancing in Massara BlueJeans really put me off! Ever since I saw that video, back when I first started to like C-ute, I couldn’t bring myself to take much of an interest in her…):
I MISS those days of Tanpopo, Pucchi Moni, etc. I think groups like those would be good for H!P at this time. I hate one-shot groups.
I like the idea of Mako teaching the lessons! Ayaka would be good too though because she doesn’t have anything to do, and I would hate to see her go. I actually had no idea Makoto was studying english >_<
-Agreed, Buono! must stay around for-ever. Their music seems pretty original as far as H!P music goes.
-I also like Athena & blahblah, but it’s a complete rip off of Mini-Moni, so I would disband them!
-Yes, the shuffles were very fun and a good way for the different H!P girls to work together and for us to hear the blend of different voices!
I know you’ll probably hate me for my dislike for Chisato (hehe (: ), but thank you for your comments!
H!P my way. « Aoi♥Usagi said
[...] been thinking a lot about the things “wrong” with Hello! Project, and seeing Maple GreanTea’s post made me finally make the effort to organize my thoughts. It seems I’ve been replying to Maple [...]